Bitter Football Reportings…

You always feel quixotic on your birthday, like a fucking rooster that just runs shit around the barn and will never get killed like the chickens or fucked like the hens and the farmer flips you his leftover shrimp and grits in the morning. So I did and I hit the lines hard. Random, hurried, drunkenly hazed on a Sunday morning and without any real research into the first set of games, my season began.

There were good vibes leftover in the culmination of last season. I rode the rotten dirty alleged super bowl winners and had ended the season on a couple good streaks *its not always a bad thing to make dough off your enemies* and was feeling good about the packers being a little overhyped this year, thus seeing their victory over NO a good shot for the bears to build off their big week 1 slaughter of Atlanta. fools luck. never emotive bet the first one out of the gate. never, fucking, ever. always stick to a guaranteed winner to start the first set of games and fuck the early parlay…dirty things happen in the drunken noontime hours of snow and blood and desert heat between the skull…and thus i failed my own advice again. my winners were locks…only 2 of 4 hit, and the bears, in my glorious moneyline read, got their faces whalloped and wives raped at the mast of the Vikings party boat.

Then it was the next set of games, the 1 yard Cowboys push that killed my soul, fuckin failed spreads by Kyle blow at life Orton ruined my NE and Pitt wrap up, of which i only banked on Pit, but still hunting late night tequilla with another busted parlay, and my big money game, Phili over Atl at -2, I knew Mike Vick was bringin his attack dog squad down to the dirty south, and he was, until his own player banged his bacon back thigh smack into the County Orange hero’s head…and so that game disintegrated and nothing was left of my body or mind or libido after 10 o clock on sunday. there was no chance of taking eli fuck me sideways on monday night games last year manning. i was standing to make all my dough back with an eagles W, but i head into week 3…wallet lighter, mind fuller, eyes bloodthirsy.



One Response to “Bitter Football Reportings…”

  1. Joker Says:

    this really killed you on the inside didn’t it

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